Sunday, April 24, 2016

Three Whole Years

This month marked three whole years we have been doing this calling. I never in a million years thought I would ever see this day in the beginning. I love this time to reflect and realize that we have had so much growth. It is still a roller coaster, but the highs are much more frequent then the lows. At this point, dare I say, I am almost afraid for the husband to be released. I don't remember what life was before, and I don't long for those days any longer. I don't want to go back to me the way I was before. I am loving the person this calling has turned me into. The growing pains to get to this point have been very, very painful, but the joy is indescribable! There is so much joy in serving the Lord. The opposition is usually present, but I have slowly learned ways to combat it. I want to make a list of the good that this calling has provided.

         1). My relationship with Heavenly Father and my savior Jesus Christ is so strong. I feel so close to them. I rely on the strength through the atonement daily. I plead with my Heavenly Father often.
         2). I feel I have truly learned to pray. As a missionary I knew we could pray and see miracles. But the way you believe as a missionary always seemed different to me. I have come to know I can plead, petition, and truly believe to see miracles.
        3). I have come to listen to the Holy Ghost better. I love having the Holy Ghost. It has been my guide to how I can reach out and serve and where my place is as a bishop's wife.
        4). The scriptures are my life line. I have never read the scriptures with such yearning as I do now. I go daily to them in search of knowledge and answers. Daily I am given literal gems of knowledge and often hear the Lord speak to me.
        5). The atonement has never meant more to me. I simply stand all amazed. The Lord truly knows us and knows how to succor our needs. I frequently rely on the strength, forgiveness and enabling power that comes through the atonement.
       6) I am a better mother. I still wish I was 10 times better, but truly I know I am better. I know what is the absolute most important thing to teach my children. I want them to dedicate their lives to the Lord. To be stretched by Him and to serve Him always.
       7) I feel my foundation in the gospel has been made stronger.
       8) The sacrament is a need. I need to make those covenants weekly to get by. Most weeks I feel I am taking everything to the altar and placing it all there as I partake. I know I take many weaknesses, shortcomings, sins and joys and place them there and start over the next week. It truly is a sacred experience so many times.
       9). I have learned to grant more grace. I am in no way perfect, but I know I am better. Everyone is trying and doing their best. The Lord is teaching all of us.
      10). I love that I am married to a righteous priesthood holder who places the Lord above all else. We have seen very real and tangible blessings because of his faith, dedication and service.

Writing this list makes it very real in my mind that all the good, bad and ugly days are completely worth it. The view keeps getting better and better in a sense. Serving the Lord requires sacrifice. He always has and he always will require that of His people. And I want to be part of His people. At the end of the day I came to a point where I feel the Lord is sanctifying me. He is knocking off all my rough edges. I am forever grateful for His mercy, kindness, grace and love.


2 comments:

  1. Thank you, I feel better from reading this and hope you will write more.

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